The next day feels weird because I am now hyper aware of every short coming I have. I text Niyah to send me her notes from class and curl myself in my bed and go back to sleep. “You know, Michael Jordan did not make his high school basketball team.” I take a deep breath. “No, mom I haven’t gotten any internships.” I misspelled extraordinary on the application. A whirlwind of emotions build up inside me. I open it and read it two more times hoping that this is a joke and my closet door will open and there will be lights and cameras and a studio audience to tell me that this is all one big joke. We wish you the best in all of your future endeavors.” We will keep your information on file and encourage you to apply again next year. However, we have decided to move forward with other applicants who we deem more fit for this role. “Good afternoon, we appreciate your interest in our Very Good Internship for your Career Program. I don’t know why I don’t know, so that’s all I can say. ‘What are your plans after graduation?” I say I don’t know because I don’t know. Every no is just an opportunity for a yes.
“You get what you work hard for,” I whisper to myself. Nkuzi for a recommendation all flood to the surface of my memory. Flashbacks of late nights writing and rewriting my cover letter, having my advisor read over my resume and hounding Dr. My thumb hovers over the Mail icon, unwilling to leave a universe of uncertainty.
My heartbeat quickens and I can barely keep my hands from shaking. I immediately sit up and suddenly the room becomes very hot. I notice I have a new email in my inbox from Some Fancy Internship. Yeah, I think today is the day I finally drop out of school and finally pursue my lifelong dream of becoming a social media personality. People on YouTube probably do not have to wake up early.
#REGRET TO INFORM YOU PLUS#
Plus I have so many skills that I highly doubt a Bachelor’s degree will overshadow that. Nothing that makes one have to be fully functional before noon seems worth it really. I briefly contemplate if graduating is even worth it.
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